What Makes Us Happy?
After graduating from college in 1990, young Christopher McCandless ignored his family’s wishes, gave away his inheritance and hiked away on an amazing, cross-country journey. Encountering strange roads and stranger people; surviving lonely canyons and wild rivers, McCandless eventually worked his way into the Alaskan wilderness, where he survived alone for 189 days before succumbing to starvation. His final weeks were spent aboard the long abandoned City of Fairbanks bus #142, which had been somehow marooned in the woods.
The subject of Sean Penn’s 2007 movie Into the Wild, McCandless has been celebrated as a folk hero; a young philosopher who courageously forsook materialistic modern values in pursuit of the deeper meaning of life. Others have taken a more critical stance, calling McCandless a careless and selfish wanderer or even mentally ill, given his decision to light his final few dollars on fire and enter the Alaskan wilderness alone, without the experience or even the supplies he would need to survive.
Although his inner workings may never be known, McCandless left us with a few gems from his journal, recovered from bus 142. “Happiness only real when shared” seems to be the pinnacle of his realizations. Whether or not this maxim is true, it does reveal that young Christopher, facing his own eminent death, might have stumbled upon just the twist that would have given him permission to reenter life as a better adjusted member of society. We’ll never know.
Although tragic on many levels, Into the Wild invites any casual seeker of truth to ponder the meaning of happiness. Must we seek it alone or do we find our joy in others? What combination of principles or actions makes happiness possible? Is there really a formula that we can follow?
To shed some light on these questions, we can turn to a very interesting Harvard study that has been getting attention in recent months. The study began in 1937 when 268 Harvard sophomores were asked to participate in what was to be a life-long study measuring “a formula – some mix of love, work and psychological adaptation – for a good life.” Amazingly, the study has been kept alive to this day, diligently maintained over decades of economic upturns and downturns, periods of war and peace, as well as the personal triumphs and tragedies of it’s participants.
Never before has this depth and breadth of information been available to the public. That we now have such thoroughly time-tested results on happiness should influence our thinking for years to come. What follows are three powerful lessons that can be gleaned from the study.
1. An Outlet for Stress
The study has discovered that, regardless of the level of success in life (which was often substantial for these participants), those who did not have healthy outlets for stress suffered mental and physical breakdowns more frequently later in life – as if the mind and body do not wear well if required to carry unexpressed burdens.
The happiest and healthiest people in the study had the means to express and let go of stress. They involved themselves in worthy causes, developed hobbies, channeled their anger through sports and their love into healthy relationships. They were highly engaged in living and expressing themselves.
2. A Little Humility
Journalist Joshua Shenk of Atlantic Magazine articulated this principle beautifully: “Herein lies the key to a good life--not rules to follow, nor problems to avoid-- but an engaged humility, an earnest acceptance of life’s pains and promises.”
Life throws so many curves. I am sure the participants of the study never planned on World War II, yet 80% of them participated in it. We simply don’t know what may happen next – and can control precious few aspects our lives. Learning to accept the unexpected, lighten up when things don’t go well and deal with tragedy seem to be important keys to a happy, well-adjusted life.
3. Shared Happiness
Looks like Christopher McCandless may have been right. In the study, those who spent the most time alone were the least happy. The happiest participants were those who sustained meaningful, healthy relationships with friends and family.
The other evening I asked my 11-year-old, Sara, to write an email telling me what happiness means to her. She wrote the following:
To me happiness is pretty much being with people you can have fun with. Maybe you like riding bikes. You enjoy riding bikes - it's what makes you happy. Maybe you like riding bikes with a certain person or someone you love. They're what makes riding a bike enjoyable.
That sums up the point nicely. Thank you, Sara.
I am sure we will never lack for theories and formulas intended to create happiness. Those who consciously seek it will always have plenty of options to explore. Whether you are driven by a McCandless-like obsession that defies your need to survive and borders insanity, or simply have been wondering how to bring more joy into your busy life, the real value may lie in the pursuit.
Sources: Atlantic Monthly Magazine; Yahoo Shine/David Romanelli
