What Is Coaching?
By: Stephen Clasper
Coaching is transformational. Coaching is a structured conversation in which you’re guided safely through important changes that will be sustainable over time in how you think or act. By giving you the right questions to think about, your coach gets you quickly to the core of the issue and then helps you put in place action steps to get the best solution that will work for you. In summary, your coach will help you to:
1. Clarify the key issues calling for change
2. Select goals that are precise, realistic, and challenging
3. Develop strategies for getting what you want
4. Work on the necessary action steps
The goal of coaching is to help you change what isn’t working and adopt new ways of doing things that will deliver what you do want. “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.” Coaching is about change and change is a psychological process best handled with care.
Why do I need it?
From early childhood our subconscious absorbs everything we see, hear or experience and then shapes the values and beliefs that determine how we respond to what life throws at us. Our personalities are formed, not because of the events we experience, but because of how we interpret those events. Some beliefs create our greatest strengths, while others produce habits that hold us back or get us into trouble. Coaching addresses these self limiting beliefs and helps to reframe our thinking and change our mental chatter. We don’t have to be stuck with our habits.
The starting point for successful change is an awareness of where we’re stuck and a willingness to do some hard work. You need to be fully committed and only you can make that commitment. The coach can’t do it for you! Once you’ve taken that step and you have a coach who will create a safe, supporting environment for trying out different ways of doing things, you’re on your way to a new you.
Where can coaching help?
The most frequent areas include:
Communication skills
Relaxation and peace
Work life balance
Self confidence, self esteem
Harmonious relationships
Time management
Career transition
Presentation and influencing skills
Pre-retirement planning
How will coaching help me?
Believe it or not, you already have some of the skills you need and your coach will help you identify the relevant skill for the goal you’ve set and then ensure you practice it in a different context until you do it without thinking. You will also be asked to focus on your strengths, on what you already do well. By building on your strengths, you have a greater chance of developing the confidence to create new, lasting patterns. If you’re good at giving feedback to your children, for example, you may be able to adapt that skill for use in another context, such as at work.
Your coach will show you how to use mental rehearsal or visualisation to practice the desired behaviour or skill until it becomes ingrained as a new habit. Research has shown that the same brain cells are fired during mental rehearsal as when using the skill in real time. With frequent mental rehearsal, we create new neural pathways in the brain so that the new activity becomes increasingly easier.
Your coach will also help you become aware of any tendency to use negative language when speaking or even thinking. Negative words generate negative energy, trapping us in less than helpful moods. You will then be guided on how to choose positive words naturally so that you quickly develop a more purposeful and optimistic approach in your communication with others.
Stephen Clasper is a personal coach and co-founder of Shakti Healing Circle in Central. Call 2521 5009 for a free consultation to take the first step toward the change you always wanted. You may also check out www.shaktihealingcircle.com.
